Make your point without making an enemy.

“Smart communicators remember to focus on two things: people and performance. Both matter when you deliver bad news. Don’t sacrifice the person’s feelings by focusing solely on their performance, or they will shift to defensive mode. They’ll stop listening to you because they’re busy defending themselves, saying, “Yeah, but . . . ” Excerpt From:

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USE THE WORDS I AM CHOOSING TO OR CHOOSING NOT TO

\”Studies have shown that very successful people never say ‘I can’t or I can’; they say ‘I am choosing to or choosing not to’. By speaking in this manner they feel in control of themselves and their destiny. It is not possible to feel truly good about ourselves unless we feel that we can shape

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Beliefs

A belief is a feeling of certainty about what something means.  Most of us have adopted the beliefs of our parents, friends, community and nation.  Many of the beliefs we use actually keep us from being successful and having all we want in a fulfilling life.  For example, many believe if they have money they

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No Harm, No Foul

“Do away with the opinion I am harmed, and the harm is cast away too. Do away with being harmed, and harm disappears.” —MARCUS AURELIUS, MEDITATIONS, 4.7 A word can have multiple meanings. One usage can be harsh and another might be completely innocent. The same word can mean a cruel slur or a pile

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Success

“As you age and conditions change, the ways in which you define success will transform yet again. When you\’re much older, you\’re likely to find success in good health, family, grandchildren, your legacy, and how you will be remembered. Where you are in life, the conditions you\’re facing, and the situations, events, and people on

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March 13, 2018 Be, Do, Have

Zig Ziglar teaches we have to be before we can do, and do before we can have. It is a very simply process but we need to understand the steps and where we are in life. [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QlWMZylMt5c?rel=0&w=560&h=315]

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April 11, 2018 Breathe

Oxygen is key to life. Proper breathing is an important part of getting your body the right amounts of oxygen and eliminating carbon dioxide. Try this exercise three times a day and you will see the difference. The ratio of the breath is inhale 1, hold ,4 exhale 2. This video uses 5 seconds and

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March 10, 2018 Only you can will decide.

I have hear that it is not what happens to you but what you do from so many different sources that it is about time I believe it and take action. Here is a clip from Jim Rohn from 1981. It does not matter how old the message is if it is true. [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPe72Tv3jo0?rel=0&w=560&h=315]

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April 4, 2018 Can you trust you?

If I were to ask you “can you trust you?” What is your initial gut response? In a situation where you knew what needed to be done and the negative consequences of not doing the right thing, would you trust yourself to make the right decision? Would you carry out the necessary things to get

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April 3, 2018 Resilience by DR. RICK HANSON, PH.D

Inner resources are like superpowers: they increase abilities, create greater success, improve quality of life, and make you more effective. Of all the inner resource superpowers at your disposal, the ability to learn is the most powerful because it allows you to cultivate and grow all of the other inner resources you desire.  Each time

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April 2, 2018 When you fail, what is your reason?

What do you tell people when you fail to achieve your goals?  Most people will blame not having the resources necessary to obtain their goals.  I did not have enough money, time, the right technology, the right people or resources.  This is one way to explain your failures but it is not because you did

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March 31, 2018 Ideas

“The best way to get a good idea is to get lots of ideas.” – Linus Pauling Once you know what you want to happen and why, the how mechanism is brought into play.  Give yourself permission to capture and express any idea, and then later figure out how it fits in and what to

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March 30, 2018 TGIF

Many people look forward to Fridays.  There is a since of accomplishment.  The weekend is exciting because there is no work requirement and you can get some rest and relaxation.  Or you can do recreational activities with friends and families.  What if we took TGIF and made it TGIT?  What if we treated everyday as

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March 29, 2018 Pursuit of Perfection?

In life we are all working towards different goals.  When we set out to accomplish anything specific we must understand a few things about human motivation.  The pursuit of perfection can be dangerous to the human psyche.  If your goal is such that one mistake can keep you form the reward, and luck as much

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March 28, 2018 Morning ramblings

Today I find myself in a very interesting state as Tony Robbins would call it.  The last 36 hours have been a whirl wind.  While the next few days, weeks and months may seem overwhelming now, we will make it through this opportunity just like any other.  We must remember life is like driving at

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March 27, 2018 Support regardless of emotion

There are times in life that we will not have positive emotions towards those we love because of the way we perceive their actions.  Today I was reading in 2 Nephi 19.  In this chapter Isaiah is speaking as the Savior regarding his anger towards the people because of their choices.  The scripture that is

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March 26, 2018 Have you live your life on tilt?

In life adverse events can very easily cause distress. Even the smallest negative occurrences can make you think that an entire day or week simply isn’t going your way. While caught up in the minutiae of your days may sometimes dictate the ebb and flow of your emotions, it’s important to keep your eye on

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March 25, 2018 Bias and fake news

We all have our bias.  We like to think that when we hear things we are objective but human nature is to take what we hear and use it to reinforce our own belief system.  The problem is that we develop our beliefs in a hap hazard manner.  Most people would say they develop beliefs

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March 24, 2018 Resulting

Resulting is when we tie our results to our actions regardless of why we achieved the outcome.  Whether is was skill of luck we change our process or reinforce our process because of the results.  Annie Duke explains why this is so dangerous. As you become a better decision-maker, it’s important to remember that just

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March 23, 2018 Embrace Uncertainty

Remember the six needs we all have from last weeks post?  Uncertainty or variety is one of the six that we all have and meet in either positive or negative ways.  And if we meet any three needs with one action it becomes an addiction. Annie Duke in her book “Thinking in Bets” says we

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March 22, 2018 Control what you can and only what you can.

Think about this last few days.  How many items that cause you worry were out of your control?  Notice the question is out of your control not out of your responsibility.  It is important that we focus on what we can control and take responsibility for every outcome.  Nothing happens to you it happens because

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March 21, 2018 Challenges

Yesterday we spoke of where focus goes energy flows and I asked you to try an exercise to demonstrate the principle.  Now that you are aware, that whatever happens to you is because of your focus, you can simply focus on positive outcomes and never have a challenge right?  Wrong, even with great focus we

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March 20, 2018 Focus 

Where focus goes energy flows.  Have you ever wondered why you get the results you are getting?  It is really quite simply, that is what you focused on.  People do not want to believe they are responsible for the bad things that happen to them but if you are honest and look at what they

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March 19, 2018 Love

There are 6 needs we all have and we all meet then in either positive or negative ways to some degree.  Love or connection is not only one of our basic needs but also one of our biggest fear.  The fear of not being loved is second only to the fear of not being enough. 

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March 18, 2018 Appreciation versus expectation

Today most people are so focused on expectations that any thing less will cause them to lose the ability to think rationally and control their emotions.  We live in an environment where if you do something that is not in alignment with others expectations it can cause riots and road rage.  Today I witnessed two

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March 17, 2018 Beliefs

A belief is a feeling of certainty about what something means.  Most of us have adopted the beliefs of our parents, friends, community and nation.  Many of the beliefs we use actually keep us from being successful and having all we want in a fulfilling life.  For example, many believe if they have money they

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March 16, 2018 6 Needs

We all have six needs.  Four of them are basic needs and the last two are the ones that give us fulfillment.  It is important that we understand we all have these, they are prioritized in different orders and can be met at different levels.  They can also be met in positive and negative ways. 

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“THE PRESENT IS ALL WE POSSESS

“Were you to live three thousand years, or even a countless multiple of that, keep in mind that no one ever loses a life other than the one they are living, and no one ever lives a life other than the one they are losing. The longest and the shortest life, then, amount to the

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March 14, 2018. Ethics, if you can you must.

Lately, I have noticed that society has lost its willingness to do what they can do just for the sake of doing.  What I mean is people rarely do their best because it is their duty or responsibility to always give your best effort and production.  As we move towards a more what is in

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March 13, 2018 All progress is change but not all change is progress. 

I agreed with the statement, all progress is change but not all change is progress. I equate progress to forward motion and accomplishment, and change to something being a catalyst for it, though forward motion and accomplishment is not necessarily progress in itself. You can change your surroundings, but it doesn’t necessarily equate to progress

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March 12, 2018 Do what you must.

Zig Ziglar says often, “if you do what you have to do when you have to do it, there will come a time that you get to do what you want to do when you want to do it.”  This has proven to be true across the test of time.  When we put away selfish

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March 11, 2018 LIVING WITHOUT RESTRICTION

“The unrestricted person, who has in hand what they will in all events, is free. But anyone who can be restricted, coerced, or pushed into something against what they will is a slave.” —EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 4.1.128b–129a Take a look at some of the most powerful, rich, and famous people in the world. Ignore the trappings

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March 10, 2018 Thoughts on change and personal progress

As you may have noticed, if you read these post on a regular basis, the content will go from my thoughts to quotes from material I am reading.  I have no set content for my daily journaling.  I want to start incorporating more of the information I am learning and how it is helping me

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March 9, 2018 The Three Circles

The essential strategic difference between the good-to-great and comparison companies lay in two fundamental distinctions. First, the good-to-great companies founded their strategies on deep understanding along three key dimensions—what we came to call the three circles. Second, the good-to-great companies translated that understanding into a simple, crystalline concept that guided all their efforts—hence the term

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March 8, 2018 Thrashing

Steve McConnell helped us understand how poorly timed thrashing sabotages every failed software project. It turns out that the problem extends far beyond software. Any project worth doing involves invention, inspiration, and at least a little bit of making stuff up. Traditionally, we start with an inkling, adding more and more detail as we approach

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March 7, 2018 The Resistance: Your Lizard Brain

The lizard brain is hungry, scared, angry, and horny.  The lizard brain only wants to eat and be safe.  The lizard brain will fight (to the death) if it has to, but would rather run away. It likes a vendetta and has no trouble getting angry.  The lizard brain cares what everyone else thinks, because

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March 6, 2018 DON’T TELL YOURSELF STORIES

“In public avoid talking often and excessively about your accomplishments and dangers, for however much you enjoy recounting your dangers, it’s not so pleasant for others to hear about your affairs.” —EPICTETUS, ENCHIRIDION, 33.14 Modern philosopher Nassim Taleb has warned of the “narrative fallacy”—the tendency to assemble unrelated events of the past into stories. These

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March 5,2018 Competition is for Sissies

Never make it your goal to compete. Instead, do everything you can to dominate your sector in order to avoid spending your time chasing someone else. Don\’t let another company set the pace; make this your organization\’s job. Stay ahead of the pack. Make it so that they want to chase you and try to

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March 4, 2018 AWARENESS IS FREEDOM

“The person is free who lives as they wish, neither compelled, nor hindered, nor limited—whose choices aren’t hampered, whose desires succeed, and who don’t fall into what repels them. Who wishes to live in deception—tripped up, mistaken, undisciplined, complaining, in a rut? No one. These are base people who don’t live as they wish; and

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March 3, 2018 A climate where the truth can be heard.

Lead with questions, not answers. Leading from good to great does not mean coming up with the answers and then motivating everyone to follow your messianic vision. It means having the humility to grasp the fact that you do not yet understand enough to have the answers and then to ask the questions that will

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March 2, 2018 CONTRIBUTION

Years ago, I remember being in one of the toughest times in my life, driving down the freeway in the middle of the night. I kept asking, “What do I need to do to turn my life around?” Suddenly an insight came to me, accompanied by such intense emotion that I was compelled to pull

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March 1, 2018 FLEXIBILITY 

If there’s one seed to plant that will guarantee success, it’s the ability to change your approach. In fact, all those Action Signals—those things you used to call negative emotions—are just messages to be more flexible! Choosing to be flexible is choosing to be happy. Throughout your life there will be times when there are

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February 28, 2018 DETERMINATION 

All of the above emotions are invaluable, but there is one that you must have if you’re going to create lasting value in this world. It will dictate how you deal with upsets and challenges, with disappointment and disillusionments. Determination means the difference between being stuck and being struck with the lightning power of commitment.

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February 27, 2018 EXCITEMENT AND PASSION

Excitement and passion can add juice to anything. Passion can turn any challenge into a tremendous opportunity. Passion is unbridled power to move our lives forward at a faster tempo than ever before. To paraphrase Benjamin Disraeli, man is only truly great when he acts from the passions. How do we “get” passion? The same

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